Saturday, September 20, 2008

NJTrip day 13: I lost my iPod while tresspassing to Shoot the Bison!

Gabcast! Creativity Cafe; Edutainment, Networking Transformational Theater #5

Soon if you click on the title, you will be transported to a movie that shows the images of the story! Of course by Shoot the Bison, I am speaking of Photographing it!

All I can say is thank God! The iPod could have fallen out at any time anywhere. I had been recording another story in the car on the way with mom, to an art show in the park. Van Saun if you want to google it. Great park filled with all sorts of amusements, rides, zoo, train, lake, at sunset is when we finally got out of the house.

I had made pancakes to serve to mom a breakfast in bed. I had brought the mix from Maui last time here in April. She didn't like I used her coffee pot to make the batter, but hey, it was the perfect size and what's the big deal anyway. I cleaned to pot (glass from a small auto coffee maker) and made her coffee as well. Served her in bed. She deserves it to put up with my always doing things differently than the way she orders me to. It happens when driving (turn here! I turn there getting to the same spot mind you, but she blows a gut that I have to do it my way and I've always been that way... You'd think she'd trust that my way is as good if not better by now. But that's a whole other story.

I purchased a digitizing box for my audio studio set up so now I can record 4 tracks of live audio, rather than just two. So now I can record jim on one track, marilyn on another, vocals on a third and my guitar on a 4th, all live! I hope our performances live up to the quality we will have capability of now? Jim are you reading this (yeah, right). The M-Audio Profire610 came with Ableton Light which I have been interested in lately. I met a lawyer in Borders who has the same puter as me and is into DP and music!

I am trying to catch why it is mother and I argue all the time. All the time. There is always some little thing where I am annoyed at the request like this... I hurt myself badly this morning. In bending to reach for the eggs to make pancakes in the bottom of the fridge, something gave in my back and a creak throughout my body humbled me to the floor.

All day I have been fighting pain and pinging myself, i.e. getting in and out of driving mom's vehicle, the bend getting out and the act of landing my ass back on the seat sent a shot of pain up my back from the point of my L4-5 compromise to my neck. All day its been tweeked, I'am walking crooked and need to lay out for a bit. Such is my life.

But the good thing is I always bounce back... the heating pad and menthal pain pads that you can stick on are working their magic. Hmmmm problem with the Profire 610. The firewire that comes with it just fell out of the port on the side of the Mac, NOT GOOD! you don't want that happening in the middle of a session! I will have to use my own cord. (I just reversed ends. That seems to have solved the problem). I may have even brought one along. I am getting a couple of songs ready to record on Thursday with Linsy the Optomotrist Bassist.

George had eye surgery. He's a good buddy. We are always chatting and video conferencing about audio, video and computer stuff. Kindred spirits. Everything worked out fine! He may someday again be my technical director at Akaku. I plan to broadcast again starting in November. I hope my spirits are up to it. There is a blog post about it here.

Friday, September 19, 2008

An Expensive Day - Facing Facts - Back into the City

I was recovering all day Thursday after my 6.5 mile romp in the city. I haven't been able to find a good place to put the pedometer on Mother. I bought it for her birthday since she at 89, is still going shopping and lugging groceries up a couple flights of stairs to her apartment. I am as usual camped out on the floor on pillows and the blow up air mattress I brought from Maui.

We didn't get out of the house until 4pm. I wanted to go to the Mall where there are lots of shops, but all the styles were not mine. I had her wait by the mall entrance until I could fetch a wheelchair for her. It was on the other side of the mall so I got another long walk in. They had a motorized scooter. As my back was hurting, I opted for that rather than a wheel chair. I enjoyed riding it back to where she held her post. She would not use it.

She absolutely refused. I think it was her ego that stopped her, not wanting to be seen or feel like an invalid. I had to ride that sucker back and get a wheelchair. I was heading back to Mom with it when my camera slipped off my lap and crashed, this time breaking the lens that
I had several times repaired with superglue. Not this time. the lens is DOA.

Her party is two days away, so I have to take another trip into Manhattan to buy a lens. Also the white suite I purchased is a bit small, so I have to find a large size. I thought I could fit if I lost a pound or two in my gut, but the pants which I didn't try on, were much too tight revealing my privates rather clearly. The life of a man in the world without a partner to love, can be rather challenging. Its always easier for two people to navigate life's twists and turns as a couple. I think I am over the hill in that department although there is always hope as long as I don't seriously entertain thoughts like I will never again find anyone to love this eclectic fool.

I must admit my fear of losing Mom. The only person that has my history and best interests in mind and who has the insight of bringing me up, and helping me integrate with this life and my very straight and narrow sister and the american lifestyle family she is bringing up. I fear I will be so alone when she passes, with no connection to anyone. After all, when is the last time you commented on this blog, my art(s) or my attempts to bring Creativity Cafe into the world?

Speaking of that project. I was near Eyebeam Gallery, today I will try to go there after getting the lens. I will also spare my body and not do so much walking. Rather I will take trains and cabs. It will be expensive, but my body just can't take traipsing through the city like the old days.

I had a chat with Lynn about our family inheritance which along with everyone elses' money has taken quite a beating. I pointed her to the Arron Russo videos and she didn't want to hear it. She forbade me to bring anything like that to the attention of my nephews. She would rather have her head in the sand than see and acknowledge the manipulations that have put us in this position (economically speaking). The greed factor has burst the bubble, fortunes are falling and the American dream, well it needs some shoring up.

After the fall of my camera, I didn't want to spend another minute in the mall. I certainly didn't want to spend any more time going through shops with boring knock off clothes that really don't express my persona.

I am having a tough time knowing mom with her aches and pains, her awesome spirit to carry on, her will power, etc. can do nothing to stop the ravages of time and eventually take her away from me. Her limp is worse. She can hardly walk and yells at me when I try to discover what exactly is ailing her. She refuses to see a doctor for her leg condition, and makes me wrong by getting angery and yelling that I should leave her alone, when I mention having it looked at. I can do nothing for her on that front and its making me nuts to see her in agony and trying to act as if there is nothing wrong.

I guess to them I was the same way. Spending every drop of energy and fiber of my being to bring into existance a new kind of community center and school to help people navigate the speeded up world we live in and change their thinking in ways that would benefit them, and symbotically speaking, their communities wherever a Creativity Cafe exists. I am still resolute in trying to attracted those who would assist with this life's mission. But things are looking bleek in that department.

I am not a happy and content person. I have such frustrations and longings. Not only for a body and heart out of pain, but for a world that doesn't settle its disagreements with war. There is a longing in me that defies description. A soul ache that I can't even describe. I am haunted by (gladly) not being able to be part of the statue quo and yet where else do I go?

I have been all but abandoned by most of my former friends who never call, never write and are more than likely as tired of hearing my spew about CCafe as I am with mothers lifestyle of putting off today what can be done tomorrow (and then never doing it) and dealing with her hording issues.

Soon I will be back on Maui which has become very inert in the fun, friendship and progress on my dreams department. Sure I have a couple of friends with whom I make music under the guise of being in my band, but I know better than to think our group will amount to anything other than perhaps some good recordings. Not that I woudn't be delighted with that! and have my spirits lifted with the completion of my first CD. Speaking of which, next week I have a recording session with Linsy to work on two of my tunes. I am needed to buy a good audio interface for my Mac. I am deeply enegaged in research.

God knows, the sounds of my soul have been in the birth canal for long enough. I just can't keep focused long enough on the music, before my flair for photography steals my energy and focus, and then V.A.R.I.O.U.S. comes around and its back to trying to find a way to further Creativity Cafe. Oy Vey. I need help. Where is that business visionary I feel I need to collaborate with, someone who can see why I have spent the better part of my life trying to bring something new and beneficial to the peoples of the world - into being and who can appreciate my efforts and my vision .

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Wednesday, Sept 17th, NJTrip2 day 10 - First Trip to Manahattan

I was in the city for the first time on Wednesday taking the bus in at around 10am arriving an hour later.  I took the subway downtown look across at a beautiful, tall model wearing purple high heals. She reminded me how much I love the look and feel of the NY Woman. We got out at 14th St.  I was curious to see where she was going and followed her for a block or two until running into another beautiful woman.  This one seemed lost as she consulted her map. I offered assistance. We walked a few blocks together. She's a young model just learning the ropes.  She had to go where the purple shoe'd beauty was going -- just a few blocks away.

I headed to my old place on Charles St. and took photos, then went shopping in the Bali and Tibetan shops for a nice jacket. Found nothing.  I put my camera on my wheeliebopper where it dropped off and popped my super glue repair. I had to find super glue gel and fixed the lens.  Then I lost my favorite smoking pipe.  The one given me two years ago by Maury with the magnetic top.  I replaced it when I got to 42nd  times square area.

I headed to Music Alley on 48th St. and 7th Avenue to shop for a new keyboard to replace my beginners casio with something with more sounds.  I want to get a professional audio interface for my Mac to record my band in formation and finally focus my energy on creating my first CD of my tunes.  

I walked 6.5 miles according to the pedometer I bought mom for her birthday. She keeps saying I must have walked a mile.   Only problem is we can't find a place on her body to put it where it will count accurately.  Her limp and cane masquarade her gate. I  was too wiped out after walking 6.5 miles to walk another 3 to meet up with Mike Sussell.   We arranged for a potential Friday meeting.

I stopped into the Interop and Web 2.0 Expo's. I love the trade show atmosphere. I was surprised by all the beer bars sponsored by each company.  There were cheese plates and crackers and I got my share of trade show booty and blinkies.  I walked past where they wash and bed down the horses from Central Park Carriage duty and was glad to be on the bus home to a mother made dinner. There was a line three blocks waiting for the bus. I was hurting and couldn't stand another minute.  I circumnavigated the line and found a back door to get up a few levels to the beginning just before the bus came.  

I tried to explain to the first guy in line my challenge, but he didn't care.  Oh well. I guess the ravages of old age and infirmary matter little after one has been working all day and is anxious to get home. I got in the first seat with my wheeliebopper crammed in front of me.  A cute Korean woman sat next to me. I spoke with her. She loved my Valentine's Heartwave Video and the Kaleidoscopic Exploration hypnotic mandala videos that I shared with my iPOD.  I gave her some 3D glasses to wear as well. A gift.

I didn't see anything I liked in the way of clothes. But, I did chat with several beautiful women in the course of the day. It felt great to be back in NYC. I just love it there... but not enough to move permenantly.  I couldn't find the Eye Beam gallery as I chose not to take my laptop the address.

Visit to the Big Apple - Shopping and Web 2.0 and Interop Expo Attendance

It was my first journey into Manhattan this trip. I headed right for the Village where I was shopping for a nice new sporty outfit. Something different than the traditional American suit and tie fare. Not my style at all. In fact these days, I am having trouble deciding who to be no less what style to "be in."

The trip was fun.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Trip2NJ9.13.08-Brooks Party - Saturday

I had a great time over the weekend at Brooks party. Well worth the
money I paid to rent a car and drive out on Long Island. Each street
name caused childhood memories to surface, and when I walked the
streets of Roslyn where I grew up (on the way to Brooks house in Glen
Cove) well, It was great to be so immersed in my past. In fact, when
I walked to the little creeks in the Roslyn duck pond property, I
forgot about the bog and gut stuck in the muck. My nice white pants
(I was going to the party in) became muddy mirrors of my experience.
I had to stand in the stream and wash the mud out. I must say, since
I was wearing my open-toe sandals from Maui, I enjoyed the mud coming
up over my feet as they sank two or three inches into the bog with
each step -- threatening to pull the flip flop off my foot entirely.

I put my pants in his washer and romped the party in my bathing suit
(I'd been wearing underneath). I was wearing my turtle shirt and had
several people come up to me when I offered my Turtle Tale in honor
of Brooks party and his guests, several of whom came up to me
afterwards to share how touched there were by my story. Those words,
from an admiring audience are golden to a spoken word artist!

Amazingly, I ran into the guy who followed me into the pants of one
flute player named Vivienne who brightened my life briefly at the
turn of the Millennium. She was actually my last girlfriend and
appears in my Christmas Maui Artists Showcase Video, produced on Dec.
15, 1999 (my dad's birthday) in the studio at Akaku Maui Community
Television. We were additionally honored with the addition of Grammy
Award winning artist George Kahumoku Jr. who gave everyone on my
staff free CDs of his music!

The party also revealed this old LA friend who refused to pay me for
photographing her because she didn't like any of the great photos I
produced in an 1.5 hr photo session for which I wanted $40. I hugged
her anyway even though I thought I'd never see her again and was glad
of it. But there she was at this party and in fact lived in the
neighborhood, moving from her place across from Manhattan where I'd
taken some great skyline images at dusk a few years back.

Being with Mom is great, and of course not without some challenging
moments when I kind of dominated her. She wanted me to keep the
piled up stash of stuff that lives in the back seat of her car, but I
couldn't see over it. She was pissed at me when I drove to her
storage and made her release some of it to a new home away from the
vehicle so we could safely see thru the rear view mirror.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Trip2NJ9.08 Back to my Roots - Roslyn, Brooks Party -revised

I took this Stereo photo of Roslyn Harbour's old Grist Mill. Its being
restored on the inside. I can remember being inside as a kid when the
mill was still operating! Its right across from the Roslyn Movie House where I saw my first movie at 25 cents with the neighborhood kids from Milburn lane.

I rented a car today to get to Brooks Party in Glen Cove. I just had to
visit Roslyn where I grew up. I stopped to take photo's and visit
the house that I grew up in and walked the town. That was a bit of a mistake...

I pulled over just before sunset at the duck pond where I first learned to sleigh ride. Where Mom used to take me to bath in the streams, where the duck we kept was released and where I used to love to hang out and visit, even when going to College at CW Post. I registered as an Art Major, switched to Music and then changed to Chemistry where I remained until struck with WCWP fever.

Once I tasted the radio station, I had found home! All other school activities paled in comparison to my joy in the studio. Many classes were cut in order to host my own show, "The Folk Project" along with Linda Hughs and engineer the news. I held a 3rd class FCC license.

I loved to record my HS friends and their Sub Celler Dweller jug band - exercising my record engineering skills that were first wet upon receipt of my first tape recorder -- a Wollensak T1515=4 stereo Reel to Reel.

My uncle Ralph exposed me to it (I thought I was listening to radio until he opened the cabinet and pressed stop. That stop was the beginning of my career path when later in life I would be come a recording engineer. My mother had bought the recorder to ease the pain of our family breaking up and soften the blow of her war and impending divorce from my father. It was the perfect gift and distraction -- not that I don't still carry scars of those moments to this day!!!

Speaking of healing, the party at Brooks was just what the doctor ordered!

More later when I plan to fill in the blanks